There are so many things I’m not allowed to tell you. I touch myself, I dream. Wearing your clothes or standing in the shower for over an hour, pretending that this skin is your skin, these hands your hands, these shins, these soapy flanks. The musicians start the overture while I hide behind the microphone, trying to match the dubbing to the big lips shining down from the screen. We’re filming the movie called Planet of Love- there’s sex of course, and ballroom dancing, fancy clothes and waterlilies in the pond, and half the night you’re a dependable chap, mounting the stairs in lamplight to the bath, but then the too white teeth all night, all over the American sky, too much to bear, this constant fingering, your hands a river gesture, the birds in flight, the birds still singing outside the greasy window, in the trees. There’s a part in the movie where you can see right through the acting, where you can tell that I’m about to burst into tears, right before I burst into tears and flee to the slimy moonlit riverbed canopied with devastated clouds. We’re shouting the scene where I swallow your heart and you make me spit it up again. I swallow your heart and it crawls right out of my mouth. You swallow my heart and flee, but I want it back now, baby. I want it back. Lying on the sofa with my eyes closed, I didn’t want to see it this way, everything eating everything in the end. We know how the light works, we know where the sound is coming from. Verse. Chorus. Verse. I’m sorry. We know how it works. The world is no longer mysterious.
My name is Jasmin but I've always liked boys with girls' names and names that end in -ie.
I'm an insomniac. I like to stay up late to watch the sky change from blue to black to beige and blue again. I'm a critically indecisive realist whose in love with the little things. I enjoy writing lists and schedules but never stick to them. I want to learn to do a million things like speak Swedish, play guitar, skateboard, hula hoop and play poker. My mind is always turning over a million things but I am a simple girl and I never ask for much. I'm a typical nerd and I'm excited by fashion, photography, books, ideas and theories.
I could pour through books and magazines until my eyes dribbled down my face in a torrent of glitter and sequins. It's true.
I like to paint what I write, write what I think and photograph what I see.
"Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everybody I've ever known." Chuck Palahniuk, INVISIBLE MONSTERS